Who is the Sexual Predator – The Accused or the Lying Teen?

We’ve encountered many instances where a man has been lured into the web of a deceptive, promiscuous teenager.  Quite often these men are of good nature, and have developed successful lives after overcoming the obstacles that life offers. With one swift drop of the gavel, however, everything these men have worked for is gone forever.

The question to be asked is who is the predator: the man that has sexual relations with a teen who lies about her age, or the teen who ruin a mans life by lying about her age?  In many states, mistake as to age is not a defense in the criminal justice system.  Therefore, even if an underage teen posts a false age on Facebook, tells a man that she is of a legal age, and has consensual sex with the man, he is held criminally liable.

If the goal of laws are to prevent these types of relationships, why not punish the teen for lying about her age?  What is currently being done to the teens in these situations?  Nothing.  What is being done to prevent these teens from ruining the life of another man?  Nothing.  No one will truly understand how unfair and unreasonable the laws are when it comes to sex crimes until they or a loved on are accused of such a crime.  Hopefully this will never happen, but meanwhile citizens should be open-minded and not be afraid of being labeled as a sex offender supporter simply for standing up to laws that are unfair.

This entry was posted in Age Of Consent and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

24 Responses to Who is the Sexual Predator – The Accused or the Lying Teen?

  1. JB says:

    Yes. Public should educate themselves and speak out about injustices against so-called “sex offenders”. The false accusers should be held accountable for the damage they do! Families are devastated! It is so sad! And the unjust laws! “Sex offenders” are discriminated against.
    Things must change! Sex offender as used in some cases, is not necessarily a violent sexual predator. It could be anyone labeled that for a number of reasons, urinating in public, taking a deal even if innocent because of bias of some courts and laws, consensual relationships that end in marriage, and as mentioned above, a teen lying about her age, etc, etc. I pray that the public and legislators open their minds and hearts to stop the witch hunts and unfair treatment of people involved in “sex offense cases”! Note that I said “people”! The so-called sex offenders are PEOPLE! And even the truly guilty (and there are many falsely accused) deserve fair treatment and just laws!

    I’m so sorry that the injustice goes on! I am thankful, however, that you and others are aware and speak out and that some awareness is growing. I hope it keeps growing and grows faster and stronger!

    Thanks for the opportunity to reply.

    • Mr.D says:

      I was splitting up from a woman that I lived with in NE. She and her daughter lied about me having sex with her daughter..she was 21 of legal age..but they stated that I had sex with her when she was 12-14-16 years old…I had proof that she was a virgin at 18..I was harassed into a plea, fired my public attorney but they would not let me fire him..tried to get the charges dismissed on evidence that the sheriff lied under oath which he did, and would not let me put into evidence a doctors letter that stated she was a virgin at 18..so I thought I would do a plea and then fight the plea deal during sentencing…that didn’t work either…then I was threatened by the county attorney and the sheriff, through my public attorney that if I didn’t do the plea that they would hit me with another felony charge or shoot a hole in the sheriff’s car and file attempted murder against me..I ask you..Where is the justice…I tried to file a report at the attorney review board, talked to the governor’s aid , and even called the FBI..no one would help me…Murderers have more rights and treated better than sex offenders..My life is ruined because of a split and an unfaithful woman..with a deceitful child.I was never allowed to confront her, I was never allowed my evidence in court, I was not allowed any legal recourse at all…I had to take the plea or I can honestly say I would be in jail for 50yrs like they promised me…The legal authorities should take a neutral position until it is proven that the sexual offense has actually happened…once the authorities go to far it is hard for them to admit that they made a mistake and will go out of their way not to admit to it. It is now a full blown conspiracy against me..and make no mistake..you don’t just do your 1-2 yr time in jail for something you didn’t do..it is a life sentence..

      • JB says:

        So sorry to hear! There may be some who are guilty, and even they have rights. And I care about true victims of sexually violent offenses, but not for the discriminating laws and Injustice against the so-called “sex offenders.” You are one of many who are falsely accused and a victim of unjust laws and bias legal systems. It is good that you share and speak out! I pray that America will wake up and the witch hunts will stop! Hang in there! Thanks for sharing!

  2. Di says:

    You all are right. My employment puts me in contact with a large number of PEOPLE. Needless to say, I have spoken with many PEOPLE that are labeled “sex offenders”. As mentioned above, most have been tricked by the same law enforcement officials they would rely on to protect them in times of danger. The law enforcement officers victimize these PEOPLE through means of intimidation and/or their infamous “good cop/bad cop” techniques. They are trained to “prey” on the alleged perpetrators’ vulnerabilities. Other PEOPLE are victimized by a wide array of teenagers. Some of whom allege abuse because they do not want to submit to an authority figure; they want attention and know this is a sure way to achieve that; they are angry at the moment and do not completely grasp the scope of their allegations; they intentionally lie about their age for a moment of pleasure, for them, but a lifetime of hell for their victim.

    Now, these PEOPLE, most of whom were once employed, productive, tax paying citizens, have been reduced to a life of unemployment or inferior working positions and conditions. Meanwhile, those convicted of varying degrees of murder, robbery, assault & battery, forgery, arson, fraud, and other crimes are not forced to register on any kind of public listing. Why is that? Is it safer to live next door to a convicted murderer, or a loving father who was wrongly accused of sex abuse by his daughter who opposed his discipline? Would it be safer to work with someone convicted of forgery or an honest man who had sex with someone that lied about their age?

    It is scandalous that America is supposed to be the land of the free and the home of the brave, yet many of these free PEOPLE are no longer free because of false sex offense allegations. And those in authority with the responsibility to represent these PEOPLE are too cowardice to stand up for justice. Indeed, these PEOPLE have been victimized by their alleged victims. The alleged victims live freely. The true victims, these PEOPLE, don’t live. They have no freedom.

  3. RSODL says:

    False accusers should get just as long sentences and why not put them on an unconstitutional register too! RSODL (Rehabilitated Sex Offenders Defense League) http://sexcrimeswitchhunt.wordpress.com/ Join Operation DROWN THE INSANE CLOWNS now…

  4. Was Not Was says:

    This is typical of life in nazi america, and it continues to get worse. Attitudes were very different until about a dozen years ago, and then the hysteria started as a national epidemic disease. The only real solution is to escape from this tyranny. My own solution is to finish my training in one of the few fields that have a high growth rate in the job market, and I will be looking at other countries that have growing economies. I want to get out of this nazi dictatorship before the government closes the borders, as most tyrannies have done in the past and present. When the U.S. dollar loses it status as the world’s reserve currency (as is happening now), the U.S. economy will plunge into a depression (this won’t have as big an effect on the rest of the world since they won’t be as dependent on the U.S. dollar), and that will be when the government will attempt to prevent the exodus of wealth and talent. If necessary, I’ll even renounce my U.S. citizenship, since our “wonderful” government tends to like to follow it’s citizens around the world trying to catch them doing legal activities that they can call a “crime”. The american people are increasingly monstrous sociopaths, who will destroy the lives of others on a whim, and for their own egos. I’m disgusted with this country, and would much rather be able to observe it from a distance, and laugh at how pathetically insane most of the population is. You may find my attitude and approach extreme, but I assure you, people like me will become a growing trend.

    • Billy Jay says:

      It's interesting that you should mention that.  I once read an article that this book that the U.S. State Department publishes annually with the names of individuals who have renounced their U.S. citizenship gets thicker and thicker every year.  Perhaps this is a wake-up call to all of these self-proclaimed American patriots who believe our government and criminal justice system can do no wrong.

  5. Step says:

    Some teens pretend to be older because they probably think that it is better and they can get what they can’t when they are younger. But once they grow older they lie again because they want people to think that they are younger. It only proves that lying is very common nowadays.

    • Jane Doe says:

      they do and they are very out of control these days.. my own child has told lies on my husband and got him into a lot of trouble with the law do to those lies. I knew my husband was innocent because the night she made the acusations on him our whole family was home together, the time did not make sense and she did this after she left our home when we were in bed for the night, went to her boyfriends house and stayed the night, had sex with him while there and never made it to school, which with her prior truancy record, hearings and fines would of gotten her put in placement. It is awful what these teenagers today can and will get away with, very sad that they are not learning anything by telling lies on someone else and ruining their life. 

      • David says:

        Thats sad, very sad, but thats the trouble with kids, now a days, they learn it from TV and I'm not saying your a bad example, but kids also learn it from the parents tooo. Thats like my boys step sister when no ones around shes all up sitting on my lap, but when the rest of the family is around shes a completely different girl..THANK GOD I know better..

  6. chris says:

    this exact same scenario happened to my then 18 yr old son in florida! A younger girl posed as a 17yr old. My son could not use the defense that she posed as an older girl on facebook and that he had texts displaying her age as 17. None of it was allowed, nor was the fact that the same girl also put 2 other men in jail for the same offenses. Florida did not feel it was important. in my opinion this girl is the predator and should have been prosecuted for her actions. UGH!!! i am so digusted by this whole situation and this law that doesnt look closely enough at all the sides.

    • SH says:

      It is a sad state of affairs when just because a girl is 15 she can say or do whatever to get herself out of a bad situation and make herself out to be the victim. Personally being involved with a 15 yr old that kept coming onto me (I’m 33), I know how bad it can be. This girl, staying the night with my fiance’s daughter came in to my room adjacent to hers and started coming onto me, very heavily. What infatuation she had with me, I’ll never understand. After kissing me, I told her to stop and to leave me alone. To which she left the room, and came back to me again. However under pressure she told cops I called her back into the room to tell her “something”. Upon further questioning, the “something” turned into a “secret”. Apparently that’s the best she could come up with at the time. When she confessed that she had really led me on, the police didn’t want to hear any of it. According to them, it’s impossible for her to lead an older man on. So here I am charged with indecent liberties even though I told her to stop and leave me alone. With a bit of alcohol in me and not wanting to offend her, I made the mistake of kissing her back. With that she literally grabbed my hand and shoved it up her shirt, lifted her bra and wallah, my hand was on her and my now ex fiance walked in on us. However the fact that she initiated the whole touching of her breast was dismissed, even when police admitted that that was her story too. This has cost me so much, and it’s not over with. Every situation is different. And to lump everyone in with “sex offender” status is just plain wrong! There are some people who didn’t WANT to be in the position that got them in trouble!

  7. Punkrockylives says:

    Something similar to this just happened where I live.
    an 18 year old guy slept with a girl at a party who said she was 16 almost 17. There are witnesses, including the girl’s friend who say she said this. The guy helped her when she started throwing up.
    They slept together. The girl was 13. So now this guy’s life is ruined, and it’s just begun. Poor kid. He’s sentenced to 15 months in prison, where he’ll probably be beaten and raped, maybe killed and then has to register as a sex offender for the rest of his life. He’s 18!
    They didn’t say who pressed the charges either, but I bet it was the parents, which is bull since they’re the ones who raised the stupid girl. Good job, not only did you raise a girl who thinks sex at 13 is okay, but you raised a liar too.

    I’m a writer and I’ve been trying to figure out what I want my first real book to be about. This is it. I’m going to write from his point of view, because I’m pissed.

  8. Jason says:

    Im in that same boat. I was 21 and slept with a female who lied about her age, turns out she was 15. I printed out numerous websites where she posted her ‘fake’ age, she even amitted to the police that she lied about her age. I have lost several jobs because of parole making me go to treatment. I served no prison time but parole for life is just as bad, if not worse. I have no idea what to do, it has ruined my life. Ive tried to commit suicide twice because everytime I get ahead parole screws me. Im trying to fight this legaly but really dont know what to do besides hire a lawyer, which I have done. Ssomeone please help!

    • Billy Jay says:

      You are not alone, Jason.  I read an interesting article online that described people who had fallen into similar circumstances as you did.  You can read this same article at http://www.westword.com/2004-06-17/news/age-inappropriate/.  This same article also talks about how pedophile panic politics, for a lack of a better term, has spiraled out of control in our great nation – the United States of America.  That is, sexually active and even sexually promiscuous adolescents misusing the child molestation laws in their state for their personal gain.  Everyone on this blog sheet needs to read this same article.  It is titled "Age Inappropriate" by WestWord

       

  9. Just Me For Now says:

    My fiance was just convicted on charges on Wednesday. His former stepdaughter accsed him of 8 years of sexual assault. He is not that person, not only saying that because he is my fiance and I have been with him for 3 years. He can not hurt a child or anyone for that matter. The “sexual monster” that she and her mother, his exwife, describe is 180 degrees from the man that I know. NO ONE that knows him believed the allegations in the first place. The girl and her mother are known liars and minipulators in the community. She did this to him because he would not sign off on her taking a settlement of nearly $100,000 in a lump sum but instead as was responsible loving father who said she was going to take it in an annuity. The only way toget him off the settlement was to put him in jail, or kill him. Putting him in jail, is slowly killing him but that aside, the settlement battle had been going on for early 4 years at the time of the allegations, when he was arrested, her and her mother went and had his name immediately removed from everything, including his son’s bank account which they spent on top of taking the settlement 4 months later. The judge was a former victim advocate and was clearly prejudice and was very unprofessional on the bench. She did not sustain legitimate objections made by the defense but instead overruled them without even looking up half of the time; and sustained nearly ever objection made by the DA, even en they were unfounded.
    I have now had to sit back a watch my family be torn apart and had to see my step son see his father through glass this morning. The monster is 100% the lying teenager. It is unreal to me how a female can simply make allegations, have no evidence, which in this case there was ZERO physical evidence, and put a man behind prison walls simply because she didn’t get her way. The plot of her and her mother, was sadly inspired be a LIFETIME MOVIE. I used to watch that channel, I’m a woman, we mostly do. I will never watch it again until there is a REALISTIC movie on there that shows that it isn’t right to do this to someone. Because until then, innocent lives will continue to be destroyed over a bratty kid not getting her way, and growing in to a devious monster who kills a man without reason.
    I watched my fiance go through times of contemplating suicide out of fear of conviction for something he didn’t do, because he wouldn’t take a plea, so from the moment he took the plea, we tossed the coin and waited for it to land. The last 4 years have destroyed his will to live because even though no one believed the charges, he had the feeling in the back of his mind that someone might. I firmly believe that girls that make false allegations of this nature should face a charge comparable to that of attempted murder or manslaughter because essential that is what it is!

  10. Just Me For Now says:

    Sorry, I typed that wrong, and missed part of what I meant to say by deleting the wrong part.
    From the moment he DID NOT TAKE THE PLEA, because he would not admit to a crime he didn’t commit, we tossed a coin and waited for it to land as 12 jurors deliberated for a total of less than 2 hours and took lunch in the process!

  11. musicgirl219 says:

    Have a similar situation to some of the above.  My fiance was accused of molesting his (at the time) live in girlfriend's oldest daughter.  These accusations came about just after he decided to leave her and cut the purse strings.  She got mad and cooked up this story and the daughter went along with it.  He went to trial once and got a hung jury.  Before going back for a second trial, he was offered a deal which included only 6-23 months in a county jail, registering for 10 years and 2 years probation.  The deal was never written down (looking back it was ridiculously STUPID to agree) because the DA said she didn't want the mother to find out he would serve such a low sentence.  After MUCH deliberation, he decided to take it rather than face a MUCH higher sentence should be go back to trial.  He then decided to take back his plea and fire his lawyer.  Long story short, the judge did not accept his retraction – he actually said he was "Pissed" that he lied and would not honor the plea.  Actually he said he knew nothing of the plea agreement…even though he had to agree to it for it to be accepted.  Of course the DA didnt speak up and the other lawyer wasn't there to say anything.  He was sentenced to a 1-4 year bid in a State Prison.  He is now over the year and has seen the parole board but we are certainly NOT holding our breath that he will be let out.  In some twisted way, we kinda hope he is denied because of all the hoops we will have to jump through when he gets out.  This is a terrible mess and I can't believe the system has let us down the way it has.  Now with the changes to Megan's Law coming into affect, he'll have to register for 15 years instead of the 10 that he agreed to.  Something has to change with the way the system works.  There was NO evidence against him, just he said she said BS.  Unbelievable.  SMH

    • B Free says:

      Sorry to hear about that MusicGirl. Plea agreements can sometimes be very complex. Often the prosecutor will not offer a plea unless the alleged victim and/or the family agrees to it. Sometimes, however, the prosecutor will make the deal without the consent of the alleged victim and/or family. In either case, the judge ultimately has the final say as to whether the plea will be accepted.

      It’s important to remember that if a guilty verdict is agreed to, but a sentence is not defined in a plea, the judge has full discretion to sentence the defendant. In some states, if the judge does not approve a plea wherein the sentence has been defined and agreed upon by both the prosecutor and the defense attorney, the judge may recuse himself.

      Once a plea has been made, it is often difficult to get a judge to withdrawal the plea without a very good reason. In some states, once you plea, you are bound to that plea. In others, you have a period of time during which you can file a motion to withdrawal the plea, but again, you must have a very good reason.

       

  12. Anon says:

    My 20 year old son (19 at the time of the "offense") was just arrested for having consenual sex with a girl who he met on a dating website.  He profile listed her as 18 – later she admitted she was 16….but her mother found texts between the two of them and texted my son and told him she was actually  14.  She begged him not to tell anyone and that she didn't want her daughters reputation ruined.  He cut off all contact of course….and now he is out on bond with an ankle monitor not allowed to get within 200 yards of anywhere children gather./….which means he can't leave home, he can't even report to probation because there is a daycare 2 blocks west on one side and 3 block east on the other side of the building.   They told him its not his problem.  

    • Billy Jay says:

      Anon?  You need to read "Age Inappropriate" in Westword found at http://www.westword.com/2004-06-17/news/age-inappropriate/.  It's got really interesting information about men and even women who have fallen into similar circumstances as your son.  I'd like feedback from you and from everyone else on this blog sheet about that article.  When I first read it, I was happy that a journalist had the courage to tell it like it is instead of spewing the Puritancial propaganda you hear on "Nancy Grace" and other biased news programs like hers.

      It gets me furious when someone like your son suffers at the hands of some sexually promiscuous adolescent girl looking to wreck havoc in some older guy's life.  The outrage of it is that at the same time our nation has an epidemic of 14, 15, and 16-year old punks who go around getting NICE teenage girls that young and even preteen girls pregnant and kicking them to the curb, because these boys get a get-of-jail free card just for being minors under both the criminal and civil laws; and not only does these deadbeat teen dads' parents encourage this behavior, our law refuses to go after these punks' parents for child support when the young girl goes through with the pregnancy and the young girl and her parents get stuck with all the responsibility of raising the baby.  How upside down is that?  Your son's only real crime was being over 18 years old and that shouldn't be a crime at all.  Why should a 14 or 15-year old boy be given a license by both the law and society to ruin a 13-year old girl's life?  It makes no sense.

       

       

       

  13. mellie says:

    My fiance was arrested on the 2nd of January because a girl he was seeing breifly 2 years.ago and randomly talked to still lied about her age. To top it off because she had received a tattoo on her.pelvis of his name it is now making national news. Which has been twisted and manipulated to make him out to this monster when that is not even the case. I have spent the day doing damage.control requesting sites please.take down this info as it is not the whole truth. I have been hung up and told too bad I report the news not statements from people that know the accused l. It has been such a heart breaking day as we both have young children. No one cares that the girl showed people fake ids and has various web sites stating she is 20—21. No one wants to hear that this all happened 2 years ago. No one wants to hear that she had similar charges brought on the father of her child. No one wants to know that detectives pretended to be her and asked him leading questions while he only knew her to be 21 at present time and that she told detectives that she had lied to him and others about her age. So now since this has made national news anyone can look him up find out personal information about him and could potentially put our family in harms way all because 2 years ago some girl lied about her age. Where is the justice in that? Who is the real victim? What more could he have done to find out her age when her own mother didn’t say anything to him? Something in these laws is seriously flawed.

    • Billy Jay says:

      Mellie?  On a TV documentary hosted by Lisa Ling, I heard about this one organization in Texas that assists individuals and their loved ones deal with the kind of chaos you and your fiance are dealing with now.  It's called Texas Voices and their website is http://texasvoices.org/.  I don't know if your state has this kind of organization, but I think every state should.  Visit that website.  It has a lot of interesting information.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


*

* Copy this password:

* Type or paste password here: